Sitting with Curiosity (Not sitting curiously!)

Now what does that mean?! We all tend to sit strangely sometimes, looking for that comfortable spot for a sore heel, or relief for the kink in our back. But that’s not what I mean.

To be open to newness – even if it’s something old and familiar sitting in front of us – isn’t easy. Not many of us sit with curiosity, not unless we have to. It can be like going to a foreign movie with no subtitles and having to watch their body language and the scenery to figure out what’s happening. Being observant and non-judgmental isn’t easy.

It takes practice.

But it is important to practice sitting with curiosity. Just as with other skills, like speaking another language, dancing the tango, or problem solving – if you don’t practice you forget how and then have to take time to learn it over again.

So what’s the point?

You might be surprised with what comes up when you step out of judgment and into curiosity. For example, is there someone that raises your hackles/rubs you the wrong way? Sit with it and ask yourself ‘why do they bother me?’ Come up with as many answers (heck, at least three) for why a behavior or physical trait sends you off the deep end.

Take a few deep breaths.

Your first few attempts might be tainted by frustration, but if you can go further, you may discover it has nothing to do with that person, but with you, your own personal values and perceptions. As these are deeply unconscious they can be difficult to observe in ourselves, until they come up against something different.

The ability to let go of having the answer or instant understanding of a person or situation actually allows you to more fully explore. This leads to more solutions, better solutions, to life’s challenges. It also makes life easier. It makes working with others easier.

So, what’s the point, really?

It suddenly makes things less personal and more universal.  No one is perfect. It’s no one’s fault.

There doesn’t have to be an answer for everything. Sometimes, things just are the way they are, and we recognize it and adapt. Or not. But we remain open to new discoveries and insights.

Try sitting with curiosity. You may be surprised to see something enlightening come sit with you.